I do not want to get a beer with you. I do not want to go to the gym or see some shows with you. I do not want to get together to talk about where life is taking us to see if we "click." I don't want you to be laid back and easy going, you guess.
I want to make something with you. To create and build and forge and discover with you. I want you to say, "What if," and be able to say, "Yes, let's." I want the words to work, to fit together, to find the scenes and the stories and put them together into something that matters. Why do you want to get a coffee, and deal in banalities, when we could consider the universe?
It's out there, you know? Do you list your favourite movies and shows and songs in a block of text to substitute your personality in order to forget that everything is possible if only you would look up and go out and find it? Did you know that this is it? And you waste it commuting. You waste it on mediocrity and student loan payments and saying you travel when really you get drunk in different cities. Who are you? Sitting in your car, your bathroom, your parent's house, your phone out, trying to make me believe you might be somebody.
And who I am? Nobody. The difference is that I don't want to be nobody. Is this what I was meant for when we are hurtling through time and space? Is all there is the results of the next election and your opinions on abortion because you're a feminist as long as somebody asks but believe you are the head of your household and students should hear both sides between creation and evolution. As though there are two sides. As though there are sides. As though from the moment of the Big Bang the universe was waiting to create the void that was you, because you would never dare to disturb it?
I stand at the end of the dock and reach out, but there is no light. There is no pool. No car. No dream. And the blocks of the sidewalk don't form a ladder to a secret place in the trees. No tuning fork struck on a star.
Swipe left.
