Four years ago, I decorated a Christmas tree by myself and I thought, "why am I doing all this work if I'm the only one who cares?"
So I stopped. When I was a kid, I had a vision of Christmas the way I wanted it, with people I genuinely liked. As I got older, I realised Christmas was a family holiday, and people were going to spend it with their relatives.
I spent a few years trying to find a holiday that people didn't have, so that I could have one. I invited people to International Talk Like a Pirate Day celebrations for years, but no one ever came. At the end, I started watching Groundhog Day every February 2nd and The Star Wars Holiday special on Life Day, November 17th, because maybe I could have a holiday just for me and that would be enough. This year, I missed both.
When I once announced my intentions to happily never celebrate anything again, a couple of very Catholic friends came down on me. Ritual and tradition and family are very important to them- they actively celebrate stuff on the liturgical calendar that pretty much no one else does, because the two of them like it, and they like doing these things for their little boy, too.
And that's all it takes- you have to have someone to do it with, or for, and I don't.
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