Sunday, April 26, 2015

Forgetting to Breathe

I'm holding tension literally everyplace.  I stop at traffic signals and tell myself to relax, that's how bad it's gotten.  My jaw clicks, I'm holding my breath, one night of bad sleep will be all I need to screw up my neck again (I pulled a muscle in it years ago and re-pull it on occasion).

What am I looking forward to?  Not enough.  Not enough to outweigh what I'm dreading.

A friend started a Dungeons and Dragons game on Facebook.  I've never played, but I like it.  I could definitely move in to that world and never leave.

I have friends to visit this summer.  Their son is almost old enough to be awesome.  (Well, he's pretty much been awesome forever, but in a social-with-grown-ups way.)

I'm directing a show, which is good, but I'm uncomfortable about it.  Hooray for self confidence!  I used to have that, but then it turned out that people like to tell you anything you do is fine, but not that, and not that, and I can't cope with that.

For the foreseeable future, that's it.  I cease to exist in August.  At least until the high school work starts up again.  And then the little community theatre.

I think I'll take a nap and hope I dream.  I like it when I tell myself stories.  I wish I could let myself do it when I was awake.

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